A little over ten years ago, I was very consumed in my nursing career and running a home health agency. I kept getting messages to start a healing center in Arkansas. I thought, “Why would I want to start a healing center in Arkansas?” I received this message at least four times. I started to make minor moves in another direction, but then I would abandon any efforts and retreat to my comfort zone. I had a pretty comfortable life in nursing and couldn’t see how to move away from it and still be comfortable. These messages came over a period of one to two years. I even made an attempt at some kind of health center in Missouri, which is where I lived at the time. So you could see I was getting the messages and trying to act on them, but I was trying to do it my way – a way that I was comfortable. When the last message came, I asked a different question. I asked, “How on earth would I start a healing center in Arkansas?” I guess this was the magic question because as soon as I asked it, my life turned completely upside down. It was as if the universe was saying, “I’ll show you how!” I was plucked out of this comfortable life that I had built and known so well and was thrust into my new life of uncertainty and complete new beginnings. I had lost every sliver of my previous life. All of my material possessions were gone. My career was gone. Everything I had known – all of my comforts – gone. All I had left was my family. I have read since then that this sometimes happens so you realize who you really are. You are not your possessions or career or station in life. You are stripped down to the bone and what is left, is “you.”
This was my experience with the etheric or universal two-by-four. I like to say that mine felt more like a ten-by-six. I can be pretty hard headed and it took more to get me to listen, I guess. I kicked and screamed and resisted the move that was being thrust upon me. I even find myself now resisting this new life as it keeps unfolding. I find this very funny since I have what seems, by many, an enviable life as I am able to live 24/7 what I believe. Most people are trying to fit in activities to do with their beliefs around hectic schedules of working jobs they don’t like with people that don’t understand them. I am around fascinating people all of the time and am able to travel to the far reaches of the world. Best of all (by many’s standards) I am around Dolores most of the time as I travel extensively with her.
As I have evaluated why I still resist, I think it is because that human part of me doesn’t like being told what to do. And no matter how wonderful this present life is, it is not what I had consciously chosen for myself. Aren’t we silly? Give us the moon, but if it didn’t come in the way we anticipated, we are not happy. I’m gradually accepting this as my life. Especially as I understand how the guidance and “two-by-fours” work.